Today, I’m just unhappy. No. In fact, I’m every emotion you could possibly think of all wrapped up in one body sitting here on my bed. My funds are running out. I still don’t have my contract. I still don’t speak Turkish. The Turks don’t speak any other languages. I can’t read the menu. I can’t order from a menu. I have just a few lira on me and the banks are closed today anyways since it’s Sunday so no delivery for me. I feel sort of lonely. The other Americans are here, but they’re in a relationship, slightly older than me, and at least they have each other for companionship. I haven’t a soul here. I keep asking myself, why the fuck did you come here!? I can’t get a phone/apt/bank account or anything else it seems because i don’t have/have applied for my damn residents permit because the school hasn’t received confirmation that my application will be accepted. Why was I required to be here so early then?? We’re not doing a thing at work, why am I here. I’m struggling to find somewhere to eat or things to eat. I’ve been at the schools guesthouse now for over a week and my bill has to be nearly 100 lira. I’m unsure if there are pots/pans for me to prepare some food, but where would I store it or the ingredients? I’m dying and I’m unhappy. 


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